10 Things Your Toddler Wants You To Know (based on true story)

1. I’m learning more and more every day. Like how many high-pitched screams it will take before you let me backwash into your water.
2. I love being cuddled to sleep. Don’t move. If you do, I’ll ruin your life. I’m not kidding. You’re my prisoner now.
3. The world around me is fascinating. I could watch this construction site for hours. I think I will. Position my stroller to face it and get comfortable.
4. I’m strong. Every time I’ve head butted you, it was on purpose. I’m good at making things look like an accident. Keep that in mind.
5. My spine is fortified with Adamantium. That’s the metal Wolverine’s skeleton is made out of. I activate it when you’re trying to push me into my carseat by becoming a human 2×4. If you don’t stop people are going to think you’re hurting me. I won’t correct them.
6. I love to laugh. At your “mad voice.” It’s a joke.
7. I like to keep moving. So if you want to get those pants on me, you’re going to need a tranquilizer gun and very good aim.
8. I’m constantly learning. Today I learned that when you say “No” you mean “I think I’m in charge. Teach me the truth.”
9. I like trying new foods. I like the sounds they make as they hit the floor and how they feel massaged into my scalp.
10. I need adequate rest. A four-minute car nap is plenty. Thank you.

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(taken from momnewsdaily.com)